Beware of Emotional Affairs

Article by Ellen Mary Dykas, Harvest USA

Josh had been at a new church for four months when Sara—his pastor’s wife—invited him to join their community group, which was a weekly gathering of both singles and married couples. Sara and her husband, Craig, wanted a group where married couples mentored singles.

Josh and Sara hit it off, and they discovered lots of common interests. Their conversation easily flowed during the fellowship time before the Bible study. Sara was surprised how much she missed Josh when he couldn’t attend. Josh realized that talking to Sara became the main reason he enjoyed the group. Not a big deal, it’s just talking.

Then the conversation time moved into texting. Not a big deal, everyone texts. But when the two of them began texting about community group issues, their sharing became more personal. Josh’s work stress and loneliness as a single man, and Sara’s challenges in being a pastor’s wife, gave them ways to grow more emotionally intimate with each other.

Then it happened. Their texting became a nightly ritual as Craig was often asleep by 9 p.m. and Sara, a night owl, would reach out to Josh to check in and see how he was in regards to his prayer requests. Their texting often lasted an hour or more. The warning line had long since been crossed.

One night Josh felt compelled to be honest and blurted out in a text: I think I’m in love with you. He waited nervously for her reply, and it came within seconds: Me too . . . my heart’s grown cold towards Craig. No one’s ever understood my heart the way you do. I need you. Her text gave Josh a rush of intoxication and yet, seeing her words jolted him: Sara was married, and her husband was his pastor!

Josh panicked. Now the reality of their too-close friendship hit him like a punch to the gut. What was so enjoyable and enriching was now an entangled mess. How would their friendship go forward? What if this got out? Would he have to leave the church? Would Sara’s marriage survive?

Discerning When Lines Are Crossed

Though Josh and Sara never touched one another, they had cultivated an unholy and messy relationship: an emotional affair. An emotional affair happens when a married person shares ongoing emotional intimacy with someone who is not his or her spouse, in a way that damages the marriage relationship. Singles can be guilty of emotional affairs, too, when they form inappropriately intimate relationships with a married person.

Many men and women miss the alarms going off when a relationship begins to cross obvious lines. They assume that because there’s no physical or sexual involvement, the relationship is okay.

But one day an awareness kicks in, and they realize it’s moving in the wrong direction.

If close friendships are an important God-given gift to us, how do we discern if boundaries are being crossed into a danger zone?

Questions to Ask

Here are some questions to help discern if your relationship has morphed into an emotional affair:

• Is there any secrecy or deception involved in your interactions?

• How much contact are you in (face to face, over devices, social media, and so on), and how does it compare to how much time you connect with your spouse?

• If you are single, how does your contact with this married person compare to other close friendships?

• Do you have romantic feeling toward her/him? Sexual chemistry? Mental preoccupation? If yes to any of these, are you seeking to feed or flee from these tempting dynamics?

• What is the content of your communication? How would your spouse (or mentor, pastor, close friend) react if she/he saw your texts or emails, or overheard your private conversations?

• Does this relationship inspire you to obey Christ or to turn away from him? Does this relationship propel you toward your spouse, or away? Does this relationship motivate you to invest more passionately in loving other people, or to isolate yourself and focus on this one person?

Brother or sister, if these questions (and your answers) make you uncomfortable about this relationship: PAUSE! HALT! STOP! You—and your friend—are in danger.

God wants us to have rich and meaningful relationships whether we are single or married. God delights in Christ-centered friendships that stay within the boundaries of his Word, boundaries that are healthy for both friends.

But God never intends for any of his good gifts to become a heart-hijacking reality that steals joy and betrays a spouse’s trust. He is committed to removing relational attachments which lead to sin and distraction. Emotional affairs are a cheap substitute for what God graciously gives: unfailing love and true intimacy of the deepest kind, which is ours in Christ.

Posted at: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/beware-emotional-affairs/

10 Ideas and 10 Tips for Family Devotions

Article by Tim Challies

A new year is just about upon us, and as it dawns, we have a new opportunity to lead our families in devotions. Whether you’ve been utterly consistent or mightily struggling, here are 10 ideas and 10 tips that may help as you consider the year to come.

Ten Ideas for Family Devotions

Just Read the Bible. This is the simplest suggestion of all: Just read the Bible a book at a time. Younger children tend to do best reading narratives, but as children grow older they need the whole Bible. Consider reading the epistles slowly, a few verses per day, taking time to discuss and apply them. Or read all or some of the Psalms, or whatever else seems interesting and applicable. Don’t overthink it–just commit and read.

Read Big Beliefs!. David Helm’s Big Beliefs! is one of the favorite devotional books we’ve used as a family. It includes a daily reading plus a short devotional and a couple of optional discussion questions. It’s targeted at ages 8-12, but younger kids will be able to stretch up for it while older kids will be able to stoop down. It is framed around the Westminster Confession of Faith and teaches a broad systematic theology. We loved it!

Read Morning and Evening. It’s for good reason that Charles Spurgeon’s Morning and Eveningremains a devotional classic. His reflections are deep, timely, and suitable for quick reading. You may have the best success with the edition edited and modernized by Alistair Begg. You may need to put some effort into finding a suitable and significant reading to go with each since Spurgeon’s devotions are typically based on a single verse.

Read the Narratives. We’ve found great value in reading (and re-reading and re-re-reading) the narrative (story) portions of the Bible. Yes, we read other parts, too. But the stories work so well. So why not read through the big picture of the Bible in 2019 by focusing on those parts. In the Old Testament, read Genesis, parts of Exodus (you might skip the building of the tabernacle, for example, and the giving of the ceremonial law), parts of Joshua (perhaps skipping the division of the land), Judges, Ruth, 1-2 Samuel, Esther, and so on. For the New Testament, focus on a couple of gospels and Acts. Read the passages aloud, one section or one chapter at a time. Ensure that each day you read enough for it to be significant but not so much that you lose the attention of the children. Over the course of a year you should be able to make your way through much of the Bible’s big story.

Read Around the Table. Sometimes it’s best for mom and dad to do the reading from their own Bible, and especially so when children are young. But as children get older and more adept at reading, it may be best to get each child a Bible so they can follow along. When you do this, you can have each person take a turn reading aloud. It may be too clunky to read one verse per person, but perhaps each person can read a few verses at a time. Or perhaps you can have one person read each day’s entire passage. This gets children comfortable with reading (and perhaps praying) in front of others while also pushing for deeper engagement with the text.

Read Long Story Short. Marty Machowski has released a number of excellent books that are ideal for family devotions, but I most-often recommend two of them: Long Story Short and Old Story New. Long Story Short is a family devotional program designed to explain God’s plan of salvation through the Old Testament and is suitable for children from preschool through high school. Old Story New is the sequel and walks children through the great truths of the Christian faith in the New Testament. Both include daily readings, discussion points, and prayer suggestions, and are designed to be completed in about 10 minutes per day. (You might also consider his book Wise Upwhich focuses on Proverbs.)

Focus on Proverbs. The proverbs contain timeless wisdom and are written specifically for young people. Young Christians need the proverbs! Proverbs are meant to be treated like a lozenge or hard candy, to be savored over time rather than quickly chewed up. Consider reading the proverbs slowly over the course of weeks or months. Read 5 or 6 each day, but pause on 1 or 2 of them, considering what they mean and how they can be practically applied. It’s unlikely you will ever read 5 or 6 without encountering at least 1 that is especially fitting for your family. We recently visited a family and joined their devotions to find they are reading the proverbs, then taking turns attempting to summarize each one in exactly 6 words—an exercise meant to make the children think well.

Read a Catechism. The majority of today’s Christians have forgotten about catechisms, but as believers we have quite a legacy with The Shorter Catechism, the Heidelberg Catechism, and others like them. The Gospel Coalition has combined the best of those two (while making them a bit more Baptist-friendly) with the New City Catechism. Catechisms approach the Christian faith in a question and answer format and invariably include Scripture to go along with them. If you structure your time around a catechism, do ensure you give attention to an associated Scripture passage.

Mix It Up. Consider deliberately mixing up your devotions for 2019. Perhaps spend a month reading a book of the Bible, then follow with a devotional book for a while. Maybe through the summer you can switch to the Proverbs, then head back to reading an epistle as you head into fall and the gospels as you approach the Christmas season. Variety is the spice of life, right? Variety will keep your children engaged and, equally important, keep their parents engaged.

Ten Tips for Family Devotions

Here are ten tips related to family devotions.

1. More important than how you do family devotions is that you do family devotions.

2. Keep family devotions simple, especially when starting out. Five engaging minutes are far better than 20 rambling ones.

3. Family devotions is not only about gaining knowledge but also about establishing patterns and displaying priorities.

4. The foundation of family devotions is simple: read and pray. Better said: read, teach, and pray.

5. Family devotions don’t need to be fun, but they must not be drab either. Focus on engagement, not entertainment or the mere transfer of information.

6. The benefit of family devotions is not only gaining knowledge but also relating to God together as a family.

7. Do not grow discouraged if your children look bored. Measure long, not short, and expect your kids to behave like kids.

8. Ask for tips on family devotions from others in your local church. Glean from their successes and false starts.

9. Expect that God will work through family devotions but do not demand that his work take a certain form.

10. Dad, take responsibility for family devotions. Lead your family by leading them to the Word and leading them in prayer.

Other Resources

Finally, here are a couple of resources you may find helpful:

• How We Do Family Devotions

• The Art of Godliness, Episode 3: Family Devotions

• Why We Fail at Family Devotions

• Worship Like a Puritan (an interview with Dr. Joel Beeke)

Posted at: https://www.challies.com/resources/10-ideas-and-10-tips-for-family-devotions-in-2019/?fbclid=IwAR3Y7t38UadsBOu2jEFERVjWpa3wf_f9RgQEPPj7HCsbFRWm27r-1qNicCc

Romans 7: The Mature Christian

Article by Jordan Standridge

My doctor told me that he isn’t satisfied with containing the cancer in my body he wants to eradicate it. When he said that I realized that we should have the same attitude with our sin, we shouldn’t contain it we should kill it!

Those were the words of Ed, a man in my church who has stage four cancer raging through his body.

I really appreciated his perspective. Despite the fact that he hates the fact that he has cancer, he hates something else even more–sin.

I’ve been thinking about what Ed said ever since. I recently had the opportunity to preach on Romans 7, and I’ve been struck with the similarities between what Ed said and what Paul is saying in this passage.

The issue I’ve been considering, though, is the seeming dichotomy we face as believers. We are to kill sin in our lives, but no matter what we do, sin will always be present until our very last breath.

Romans 7 is one of the most controversial passages in Scripture as far as debates are concerned. The big question people ask is, is Paul referring to a believer as he talks through Romans 7:14-25? Even among those who agree that he is speaking about a believer, there is much debate as to whether the person described is a mature or an immature Christian.

I take the view that this is describing the type of Christian we should all strive to be. This, in other words, is the most mature of believers, and I have four reasons why.

Paul Hates His Sin

Paul is very clear that he doesn’t want to sin. He hates it. That is in direct opposition to how he describes non-Christians just four chapters earlier. In Romans 3:10-23, he describes unbelievers as not being able to do good. As being swift to shed blood. As people who do not seek after God. In Romans 1, he lists an incredible list of sins, and then declares that unbelievers practice those things and give approval of those who do them! Paul does not seem to believe that unbelievers have the capacity to hate their sin. In fact, I would go as far as to say that unbelievers are blinded as to the extent of their sin.

In Philippians 3, Paul, on the other hand, describing himself before Christ, though he had kept the law perfectly. He says that he was blameless as far as the law is concerned. He didn’t hate his sin before Christian, he was completely blinded to it. In Romans 7, it’s a different story. He says in verse 15, “I do the very things I hate.” In verse 19, “the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.”  In verse 21 he says, when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand.” These are the words of someone who hates sin and wants to please God.

One of the ways you can know that you are a Christian is if you hate your sin. Of course, everyone hates the consequences of sin, but believers–those who have received a new heart–hate the fact that their sin displeases their Savior.

Paul is Humble

True humility is an impossible trait for an unbeliever to possess because true humility only comes when you believe in the God of the Bible. The God of the Bible demands that you believe three things about yourself. That you are a sinner (Rom. 3:23), that you deserve hell for eternity for your sin (Rom. 6:23), and that you believe that you can’t contribute one iota to your salvation (Eph. 2:8-9).

Paul is marked by humility throughout Romans 7. He calls his actions evil in Romans 7:19, 21. He says that, “nothing good dwells in me” (Rom. 7:18). He calls himself a “wretched man” in Romans 7:24. This is a humble man who realizes that without the Lord’s help he can’t be saved nor can he be sanctified.

Another way that you can know that you are a Christian is through your humility. You needed to be supernaturally humble to be saved in the first place, but humility continues and marks your life once you receive a new heart.

Paul is Happiest When Holy

One of the things that struck me about studying Romans 7 is that Paul is happiest when he is holy. This man is despairing in his present state.

In verse 22, Paul shouts a truth that is only true for born-again believers. He says, “For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being.” Like the man in Psalm 1, His delight is in the law of the Lord. He understands that true joy is only found in those who listen to God’s Word.

Psalm 32 is a great example of this. David experienced turmoil because he was a child of God. When he kept silent about his sin, his body wasted away. But when he confessed his sin, it produced gladness and much joy (Psalm 32:11).

One of the ways that you can knowyou are a Christian is if your love for Jesus causes you to desire holiness above all else. Obeying God’s Word is the desire of your heart.

Paul is Hoping in Heaven

Because Paul’s greatest goal in life is holiness, his greatest desire is Heaven. After walking through the despair of the Christian life, the knowledge of the fact that he will never be fully successful in his quest to put to death the deeds of the flesh, his only solution for it all is to rejoice in the deliverance found in Jesus Christ. (Rom. 7:25)

The Christian’s greatest desire on earth is to be with his Savior in Heaven. Our Savior will wipe away our tears, remove all pain, and will do away with the consequences of sin in our lives. Sin is the root of all problems that we face in this life, and a true Christian can’t wait to be with Christ in perfect holiness.

Joni Eareckson Tada, who has constantly battled pain throughout her life, said it best when she said,

“Don’t be thinking that for me in Heaven, the big deal after I get to see Jesus is to get my new body, no, no, no I want a glorified heart! I want a glorified heart that no longer twists the truth, resists God, looks for an escape, gets defeated by pain, becomes anxious or worrisome, manipulates my husband with precisely timed phrases…”

Joni vocalizes our greatest sentiment as believers. That to live is Christ and to die is gain (Phil. 1:21). Non-believers cannot comprehend this fact. Paul, according to Romans 7, must be a Christian because he hates sin, he is humble, he’s happiest when holy, and he reminds us that his greatest hope is in Heaven where Jesus is, sin is eradicated and holiness is the way of life.

True believers long for Heaven for many different reasons, but the greatest of which is that they will be with Jesus and worship Him without any sin holding us back.

Do you long for Heaven?

Posted at: https://thecripplegate.com/romans-7-the-mature-christians-struggle/

A Different Kind of Profanity

Article by David Prince

What would you do if one of your children walked in your house and spoke a string of four-letter words? What would you do if one of your children walked in your house grumbling? I fear that most of us would drop everything and confront their intolerable use of four-letter words (and rightly so) but would say nothing about the grumbling or maybe say something like, "I am sorry you are having a bad day." You may say, "Yes, but the four-letter words are profanities." So is grumbling.

We tend to reason that grumbling is not a big deal because it is not actually doing anything it is simply talk. In contemporary American culture grumbling is often ingrained as a way of life and many treat it as harmless personal therapy. We tend to rename it as something like venting in order to remove the stigma. Grumbling is so habitual that we often miss the irony of our words when we stand in front of closets full of clothes and murmur that we do not have anything to wear. Or when we stand before refrigerators packed with food and say we don't have anything to eat.

In the Bible, grumbling is described as corrosive. A grumbling spirit never stays self-contained but begins to infect all aspects of life and thought with an entitlement worldview. Parents who model grumbling or treat it as acceptable when their children grumble are placing their kids in character quicksand. Grumbling and thankfulness cannot coexist. One always vanquishes the other. A grumbler becomes immune to gratitude because no matter what happens circumstances will always bump up against our personal desires.

In Exodus, the Israelites leave Egypt walking between sovereignly walled up water; then, within one month of that event the awe-inspired gratitude is erased. Why? They are thirsty (Ex 15:22-17:7). The irony that they saw the power of a God who can control the Red Sea and now a bit of thirst has them complaining should not be lost on us. Moses had courageously been used by God to confront Pharoah and lead the nation out of bondage in Egypt but now they get a bit hungry and ask him, "Would that we had died by the hand of the LORD in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the meat pots and ate bread to the full, for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger" (Ex 16:3).

God had provided them water and he now provides them bread and quail. They are instructed to gather only as much bread as they need for each day, but not everyone obeys (Ex 16:20). When they get thirsty again and say, "Why did you bring us up out of Egypt, to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?" (Ex 17:3). You get the point. Grumbling vanquishes awe-inspired gratitude. Moses rightly asserts, "Your grumbling is not against us but against the LORD" (Ex 16:8). The same is still true. Parents who grumble and permit their children to grumble are catechizing them in discontent with the Lord.

In the New Testament, John 6:25-59, Jesus asserts himself as the "bread of life" after his miraculous feeding of the five thousand (John 6:1-15). Jesus, like Moses, provides bread and meat for the people. Jesus tells them that they are to believe in him (John 6:29). Ironically, the people who just saw an amazing sign say they require a sign to believe. Jesus said, "I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst (John 6:35). How do they respond? "So the Jews grumbled about him" (John 6:41, see also, 43, 61). The Greek word for "grumble" is "gonguzō," which actually sounds like murmuring.

Paul tells the church at Corinth not to grumble as Israel did in the wilderness (1 Cor. 10:5-11). He says, "these things happened to them as an example, but they were written down for our instruction, on whom the end of the ages has come" (1 Cor 10:11). James admonishes his readers not to "grumble" against each other' (James 5:9). Likewise, Peter tells his readers to "show hospitality to one another without grumbling" (1 Pet 4:9). In Philippians, Paul exhorts the church to have the mind of Christ and reflect his self-sacrificial example on display in his incarnation and crucifixion (Phil 2:5-11). Then, one of the first applications of how to do so is, "Do all things without grumbling or disputing" (Phil 2:14).

There seems to be a vast discrepancy between the way most of us think about grumbling and how the Bible speaks of it. We are wrong, the Bible is right. Parents often fixate on grades, success, and achievement in the lives of their children. However important these things are, they are far less significant than whether or not our children become grumblers with an entitlement worldview. To profane is to treat that which is holy as common. In Christ, our very lives are holy and our words are sacred. That reality is why grumbling in the Bible is profanity.

Grumbling is doing something, something profane and corrosive. Grumbling vanquishes thankfulness and makes us insensibly immune to awe. In other words, when we grumble, we are using our words to preach hellish sermons, not holy ones--sermons for which Satan would gladly say, "Amen." May we see grumbling as profanity against God, and correct it in our lives and in the lives of our children.

About the Author: David E. Prince is pastor of preaching and vision at Ashland Avenue Baptist Church in Lexington, Kentucky and assistant professor of Christian preaching at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. He is the author of In the Arena and Church: The Promise of Sports for Christian Discipleship and Church with Jesus as the Hero. He blogs at Prince on Preaching and frequently writes for The Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission, For the Church, and Preaching Today.

Posted at: http://www.reformation21.org/blog/2018/12/a-different-kind-of-profanity.php

Talking at versus Talking to

Article by Brad Hambrick

Here’s another classic argument starter – actually its more of an argument fuel-er, because the disagreement is usually under way when this “debate of classification” is engaged. So what is the difference? Both definitions below assume a difficult life situation.

“Talking At” is the act of engaging with another person in a virtual monologue for the purpose of releasing an unpleasant emotion. Two key components of this definition should be defined further. First, a “virtual monologue” is a conversation in which any dissent, alternative perspective, or even interruption is viewed as arguing or being on the other team. Second, the word “releasing” should be understood in contrast with sharing a burden. When “talking at” the goal is not to invite another person into your struggle, but to unload the struggle on the other person.

“Talking To” is the act of engaging with another person in a dialogue for the purpose of inviting them into your struggle and seeking perspective, correction, or encouragement to persevere in the difficult circumstance. The key element here is that the other person is viewed as more than an audience and the purpose of speaking is more than an emotional release. We are requesting a companion in hard/frustrating times; not seeking to speak against something to a mute set of living ears.

Have you ever been asked to 'talk to' me instead of 'talking at' me? What's the difference?CLICK TO TWEET

So what is the problem when we “talk at” someone? While the list could definitely be longer, I would like to point out two problems.

First, “talking at” someone reveals a heart of pride and defensiveness. Anger is a proud emotion. Notice that in James 4:1-10 when he transitions from the theory of conflict (v. 1-5) to

the practice of resolution (v. 6-10) the pivot point is pride (v. 6). When we speak with someone—usually a loved one—about a problem and do not want to hear what they have to say, that is a battle with pride. We have become the fool of Proverbs who resists instruction (4:13, 8:10, 9:9, 10:17, 13:1, 15:5, 16:22).

While it is not wrong to want to be fully heard and adequately understood before receiving instruction or perspective, sharing a hurt implies that we are inviting someone to speak into our life. It takes humility and courage to allow someone to do that. But to speak and not listen is like giving someone an invitation and rebuking them when they arrive.

Second, “talking at” someone detaches us from the “one another” ministry by which God intends to strengthen and encourage us. Galatians 6:2 says we are to, “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” The implication is that this is the normal interaction of believers. So while pride (problem one) reveals that my heart is not where it ought to be, this detachment (problem two) cuts me off from one of God’s primary remedies for this problem.

So what should I do to resist the temptation to “talk at” my loved ones when I’m upset? Consider the following suggestions:

• Make frequent eye contact during conversation. When we “talk at” someone we tend to look though them or our eyes move all over the room.

• Ask the person to pray for you after you finish telling your concern to serve as a clear conversational bridge between your sharing and the dialogue to follow. If that seems out of place, you’re probably out of control or defensive a way that will make the conversation unproductive.

• Make sure you have a few questions in mind to ask after you’re finished telling your concern and that those questions are not merely rhetorical or yes-no questions confirming your perspective.

Posted at: http://bradhambrick.com/talking-at-vs-talking-to/

Quiet Resting Places

Article by Charles Spurgeon

"My people shall dwell in quiet resting places."
-- Isaiah 32:18

Peace and rest belong not to the unregenerate, they are the peculiar possession of the Lord's people, and of them only. The God of Peace gives perfect peace to those whose hearts are stayed upon him. When man was unfallen, his God gave him the flowery bowers of Eden as his quiet resting places; alas! how soon sin blighted the fair abode of innocence. In the day of universal wrath when the flood swept away a guilty race, the chosen family were quietly secured in the resting-place of the ark, which floated them from the old condemned world into the new earth of the rainbow and the covenant, herein typifying Jesus, the ark of our salvation. Israel rested safely beneath the blood-besprinkled habitations of Egypt when the destroying angel smote the first-born; and in the wilderness the shadow of the pillar of cloud, and the flowing rock, gave the weary pilgrims sweet repose.

At this hour we rest in the promises of our faithful God, knowing that his words are full of truth and power; we rest in the doctrines of his word, which are consolation itself; we rest in the covenant of his grace, which is a haven of delight. More highly favoured are we than David in Adullam, or Jonah beneath his gourd, for none can invade or destroy our shelter. The person of Jesus is the quiet resting-place of his people, and when we draw near to him in the breaking of the bread, in the hearing of the word, the searching of the Scriptures, prayer, or praise, we find any form of approach to him to be the return of peace to our spirits.

"I hear the words of love, I gaze upon the blood,
I see the mighty sacrifice, and I have peace with God.
'Tis everlasting peace, sure as Jehovah's name,
'Tis stable as his steadfast throne, for evermore the same:
The clouds may go and come, and storms may sweep my sky,
This blood-sealed friendship changes not, the cross is ever nigh."

Charles Spurgeon

Charles H. Spurgeon (1834-1892) served as the Pastor of the Metropolitan Tabernacle in London, England for nearly forty years and is the founder of Spurgeon’s College. Having preached to over 10 million people in his lifetime and being widely considered the “Prince of Preachers,” Spurgeon published more words in the English language than any other Christian in history and baptized more than 14,000 converts.

Posted at: https://ftc.co/resource-library/blog-entries/quiet-resting-places

Relying on God in Times of Desperation

Article by: Meredith Hodge

His heart pounded, his lips quivered, decay crept into his bones, and his legs trembled (Habakkuk 3:16). He was confused, angry, terrified, and desperate for relief. He cried, “O Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear?” (Habakkuk 1:2). Habakkuk, an Old Testament prophet, experienced a season of trials that seemed endless. He was desperate for relief, for change, for God to intervene. Does that sound like something you can relate to? 

I too recently felt like Habakkuk. The weight of grief, depression, and anxiety consumed me to the point where my heart pounded, my lips quivered, my legs trembled, and it felt like decay crept into my bones. My heart and flesh screamed for relief—and in my desperation, I found myself tempted to stray from the truth of God’s Word. I desired comfort above all else, but was called to rely on the Lord in my season of desperation. 

When you and I feel like there is “no hope for a harvest” (Habakkuk 3:17), when desperation distracts us from God’s truth, and when our faith is shaken, what do we do? We can learn from sufferers like Habakkuk to: 

1. Rely on God by faith

Every believer in Jesus Christ is called to a life of faith (Galatians 2:20). Faith beckons us to rejoice in the Lord and be joyful in God our Savior (Hab. 3:18). When we love and are joyful through trials, it is the ultimate demonstration of true faith. Christian faith doesn’t rest on what is seen and what is temporary—it relies on the all-sufficiency of Christ (2 Corinthians 4:18). 

In many seasons of desperation, it’s often challenging to rejoice in faith. When we feel spiritually dry and cannot pray as we ought, we can rely on God through the Holy Spirit. The Father sent us the Holy Spirit in Jesus’ name, One who helps us in our weakness by interceding for us with groanings too deep for words (Romans 8:26). We can rely on him to convict, guide, help, and comfort us in and out of trials (John 14:26; Isaiah 11:2; John 16:7:15). The Spirit gives us freedom (2 Corinthians 3:17) and enables us to abound in hope (Romans 15:13). 

2. Be Honest with God

Habakkuk was far from denial regarding his situation. Through his knowledge of the Father’s character, he fueled honest prayers. He expressed himself passionately, honestly, asking “Why are you silent?” (1:13) and “Why do you tolerate wrong?” (1:3). Our Savior Jesus modeled this numerous times in his earthly walk, where it’s recorded that he prayed all night to God (Luke 6:12). We also see Christ’s honesty about his circumstances in Matthew 26, where three times he asks the Father to take the cup of suffering away from him (vv. 39, 42, 44).   

We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ and have been justified by faith (Romans 5:1). Therefore, we can freely approach him in honest prayer and with faith-filled hearts. By drawing near to and seeking him in humble prayer, we will receive a heavenly reward (Hebrews 11:6). And because our heavenly Father knows our deepest thoughts (Psalm 139:4), it is to our spiritual benefit to communicate with him honestly. Yet, we must rely on his grace, not his response. 

3. Rely on God’s grace

We have a warm invitation from the Creator of the universe to approach his throne of grace to find mercy in our time of need (Hebrews 4:16). By faith, we acknowledge that God is not obligated to respond to our questions or cries—but we rely on the gift of his justifying grace to us through Christ (Romans 3:24). On this side of heaven, we may never comprehend why God acts or withholds in our lives—but we can rest in the truth that his grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9). 

James exhorts us:

But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, ‘God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. (James 4:6-10)

4. Rely on God’s Power in Christ

When you face trials, remember God’s power and love displayed through his Son Jesus (John 3:16). Christ demonstrated and fulfilled his mission to live a sinless life (1 Peter 2:22), yet we see that he also desired relief (Luke 22:42) and felt the Father’s silence (Matthew 27:46). Through his obedience and painful suffering, Christ canceled our debts through his perfect sacrifice. The marvelous truth is that pain and death were not the end for Jesus Christ—and they are not the end for you. Our all-powerful Messiah defeated death and rose to life and glory, where all who believe in him will be also. 

We can rely on Christ’s power, which has been perfected in our weaknesses and rests upon us (2 Corinthians 12:9). Christ’s power can be more clearly demonstrated through our weaknesses when we submit to his plans. He is willing and able to accomplish even greater things than we could ever do in our own strength. Like Paul, we can say, “For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10). 

Trusting in God’s Perfect Timing

Remember, the Lord was not ignoring Habakkuk’s or Jesus’ prayers, and he does not disregard ours either. His silence is not equal to a lack of care; he works behind the scenes, where together all things work for the good of those who love him (Romans 8:28). By faith, we must trust in his timing. God responds to Habakkuk’s complaints by promising, “Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay” (2:3). And in time, we will stand in awe at what he has done (Habakkuk 3:2). 

As you rely on God’s power and grace by faith, I pray that you “stand in awe” (Habakkuk 3:2) and are “utterly amazed” (Habakkuk 1:5) as you confidently proclaim alongside Habakkuk:  

Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

The Sovereign Lord is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to tread on the heights. (Habakkuk 3:17-19, NIV)

Posted at: https://unlockingthebible.org/2018/12/relying-god-times-desperation-habakkuk/

The Therapeutic Gospel

Article by Steve Cornell

When you hear a pastor or teacher invite people to come to Jesus, listen carefully to the emphasis on what Jesus will do for the person who comes to him.

There is a subtle but dangerous distortion of the gospel that has become popular in many Churches.

A growing number of pastors are inviting people to come to Jesus on terms that are not consistent with our Lord’s own invitations to follow him.

Question: Are we twisting the gospel around the felt needs and expectations of a self-centered culture?

The therapeutic gospel leaves one with the distinct impression that, “Jesus and the church exist to make you feel loved, significant, validated, entertained, and charged up. This gospel ameliorates distressing symptoms. It makes you feel better. The logic of this therapeutic gospel is a jesus-for-Me who meets individual desires and assuages psychic aches” (David Powlison).

Most pressing felt needs?

Dr. Powlison summarizes the felt needs that the therapeutic gospel addresses. 

• I want to feel loved for who I am, to be pitied for what I’ve gone through, to feel intimately understood, to be accepted unconditionally;

• I want to experience a sense of personal significance and meaningfulness, to be successful in my career, to know my life matters, to have an impact;

• I want to gain self-esteem, to affirm that I am okay, to be able to assert my opinions and desires;

• I want to be entertained, to feel pleasure in the endless stream of performances that delight my eyes and tickle my ears;

• I want a sense of adventure, excitement, action, and passion so that I experience life as thrilling and moving. 

“In this new gospel, the great ‘evils’ to be redressed do not call for any fundamental change of direction in the human heart. Instead, the problem lies in my sense of rejection from others; in my corrosive experience of life’s vanity; in my nervous sense of self-condemnation and diffidence; in the imminent threat of boredom if my music is turned off; in my fussy complaints when a long, hard road lies ahead. These are today’s significant felt needs that the gospel is bent to serve.”

These felt needs “are defined just like a medical problem. You feel bad; the therapy makes you feel better. The definition of the disease bypasses the sinful human heart. You are not the agent of your deepest problems, but merely a sufferer and victim of unmet needs. The offer of a cure skips over the sin-bearing Savior. Repentance from unbelief, willfulness, and wickedness is not the issue. Sinners are not called to a U-turn and to a new life that is life indeed. Such a gospel massages self-love. There is nothing in its inner logic to make you love God and love any other person besides yourself. This therapeutic gospel may often mention the word ‘Jesus,’ but he has morphed into the meeter-of-your-needs, not the Savior from your sins. It corrects Jesus’ work. The therapeutic gospel unhinges the gospel.” (David Powlison).

Posted at: https://thinkpoint.wordpress.com/2014/06/04/the-therapeutic-gospel/

Humility is Not an Emotion

Article by: Steve Cornell

Humility is sometimes associated with quiet, less outgoing or passive personalities. But this could be very misleading.

Misunderstanding humility is risky because this quality is essential to one’s relationship with God.

• “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble” (I Peter 5:5).

Jesus established humility and unconcern for social status not only as the psychological structure of His kingdom but also as a basis for entrance into it. (see: Matthew 18:1-3).

Thinking deeply about humility

• “Humility is not itself an emotion, like joy or gratitude or contrition.”

• “A person could be a wonderful exemplar of humility without ever feeling humble; in fact, one who frequently feels humble is probably not very humble.”

• “But humility is a disposition not to feel the emotions associated with caring a lot about one’s status. It is the ability to have my self-comfort quite apart from any question about my place in the social pecking order (whether the criterion is accomplishments, education, beauty, money, power, fame, or position).”

• “Humility is self-confidence that runs far deeper than the tenuous self-confidence of the person who believes in himself because others look up to him.” 

• “Those who need to excel others to think well of themselves— who seek value at the expense of others —who try to climb to honor by using others — who construct their glory upon the shoulders of weakness found in others— who engage in the ‘dangerous business of building self-assessments on watching to see how they’re doing in comparison with others, — those who live this way are — in some profound sense — actually degrading themselves and, far worse, cutting themselves off from both God and people.”

• “There is something in humility which – strangely enough — exalts the heart, and something in pride which debases it” (Quotes above from: Spiritual Emotions, Robert Roberts).

Who is the greatest in the kingdom?

“…the disciples came to Jesus and asked, ‘Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?’ He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me” (Matthew 18:1-4)

Jesus said, “Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”

• Self-humbling is required for kingdom entrance: verse 4 – “Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

• Humble hospitality is a test of the heart: verse 5 – “And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” (Mt. 18:1-5; cf. Lk. 18:9-13).

Posted at: https://thinkpoint.wordpress.com/2013/08/10/humility-is-not-an-emotion/

The Way of Worship

Article by Kevin DeYoung

There’s a story in the New Testament where Paul visits the great city of Athens. Like Oxford or Cambridge or Boston, Athens was a famous intellectual city, renowned for its history, its learning, and its contribution to culture. Athens was said to be the glory of Greece.

And yet have you ever noticed Paul’s reaction when residing in this world-class city? Was Paul impressed with its intellect? Did he fall in love with its architecture? Was he amazed by their food?

Acts records that “his spirit was provoked within him as he saw that the city was full of idols” (17:16). Later he says to Athenians, in effect, “Look, I can see you are very religious. You have temples and rituals and statues all over the place. You are really into worship. But I’m telling you: you’re going about it in the wrong way” (see Acts 17:22–23). That’s why Paul was provoked in his spirit. He could see that no matter how spiritual or how smart or how sincere they may have been, they were worshiping God in a way that did not please him.

If the first of the ten commandments is against worshiping the wrong God, the second commandment is against worshiping God in the wrong way. The people in Athens were guilty of both. They were ignorant of the God who raised Jesus from the dead, and their approach to religion was not what the true God had prescribed.

SELF-WILLED WORSHIP

Most generally, the second commandment forbids self-willed worship—worshiping God as we choose rather than as he demands. In particular, the second commandment makes two prohibitions: 1) We are not to make images to represent God in any form, and 2) We are not to worship images of any kind.

The second commandment does not intend to outlaw art or painting or aesthetic considerations. The tabernacle displayed angels and palm trees, the ark will have cherubim, and God himself gave the Spirit to Bezalel and Oholiab that they might be skilled artists and craftsmen. God is not against beauty. What he prohibits is infusing any object with spiritual efficacy, as if man-made artifacts can bring us closer to God, represent God, or establish communion with God.

The Old Testament is full of examples of God’s people using man-made artifacts for self-willed worship. The golden calf is the most famous example. Remember, Aaron proclaimed a feast to Yahweh, and the people declared that these were the gods who brought them up out of Egypt (Ex. 32:4–5). The Israelites weren’t worshiping Baal. They were trying to worship the Lord their God, but they were doing it in the wrong way. They were violating the second commandment.

At other times, the Israelites treated their religious symbols as though they had real religious powers. This too was a violation of the second commandment, turning the ark into some kind of talisman (1 Sam. 4:1–11) or treating the temple like a good luck charm (Jer. 7:1–15). We can do the same with church buildings or pulpits or the cross around our neck.

Like most of the Decalogue, the second commandment is not hard to understand. The what is fairly straightforward. The why and how take some more explanation. To that end, I want to give five reasons for the prohibitions in the second commandment.

NO ONE LIKE HIM

First, God is free. Once you have something to represent God or worship as if it were God, you undermine God’s freedom. We start to think we can bring God with us by carrying around a statue. Or we think we can manage God with the right rituals. Or we think he’ll be our benefactor if we simply pray in a certain direction or make an offering before a graven image. Anytime we make something in order to see God, or see something that stands in for God, we are undermining his freedom. God is Spirit, and he doesn’t have a body (John 4:24). It is not for us to make the invisible God visible.

Second, God is jealous. No image will capture God’s glory. Every man-made representation of the Divine will be so far less than God as to incite his jealousy. Think about it: the more chaste and pure a husband, the more his jealousy is aroused by an adulterous wife. God is supremely pure, and he cannot bear to share his glory with another, even if the other is a sincere attempt to represent (and not replace) the one true God. God is a being unto himself. In fact, he is being. His glory cannot be captured in a picture or an image or a form. That’s why even in Revelation when we have a vision of the One on the throne, he is “shown” to us in visual metaphors: lightning, rainbow, colors, sea, re, lamps, thrones, etc.

The world of the ancient Near East divinized everything. The Israelites divinized nothing—not Father Time or Mother Earth or the sun or the moon or the stars. The separation between God and his creation is one of the defining characteristics of biblical Christianity. Any human attempt to bridge that chasm is not only an attempt at the impossible but an affront to the unparalleled majesty of God.

Third, believing sight comes by sound. In the Bible, especially on this side of heaven, we see by hearing. As Deuteronomy later made clear, the Sinai experience was a paradigm for God’s self-revelation. When the Lord appeared to the people on the mountain out of the midst of re, Moses reminded them, “You heard the sound of words, but saw no form; there was only a voice” (Deut. 4:12). And because they saw no form, the Israelites were commanded not to corrupt themselves by making visible images (4:15ff.).

We make no apology for being Word-centered and words-centered. Faith comes by hearing (Rom. 10:17). That’s how God designed it because that’s how he has chosen to reveal himself. Christian worship is meant to be wordy and not a breathtaking visual display. If God wanted us to see him in worship, he would have presented himself differently in the Sinai theophany. The way God “showed up” to give the Ten Commandments says something about how we are to keep the Ten Commandments.

Fourth, God provides his own mediators. At their best, God’s people have employed images and icons not because they thought God could be housed in a marble bust, but in order to provide more intimate access to God. If God is in heaven, it makes sense that we would want a little portal for him here on earth.

But God’s people should know better. The saints in the Old Testament did not need to fashion an intermediary for themselves; God had already promised mediators through the prophets, priests, and kings. God had his own way to draw near to his people, culminating in a final Mediator who would embrace all three offices at once and pitch his tent among us (John 1:14).

Fifth, we don’t need to create images of God because he has already created them. The implications of Genesis 1:26–27 are staggering. We are the divinely chosen statues meant to show what God is like, created in his image and after his likeness. Idolatry diminishes God and diminishes us.

In Ezekiel 18:11–13, right in the middle of a host of horizontal, neighborly sins, is the mention of idolatry. Why? Because mistreating other people and worshiping idols have the same root: a violation of the divine image. In one case, we are looking for God’s image where it doesn’t exist (idolatry), and in the other case we are ignoring God’s image where it does exist (sins against our neighbors).

We are God’s statues in the world, marking out the planet as his and his alone. He does not need our help in making more images; he asks for our witness.

Content taken from The 10 Commandments: What They Mean, Why They Matter, and Why We Should Obey Them by Kevin DeYoung, ©2018. Used by permission of Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers, Wheaton, Il 60187, www.crossway.org.

About the Author: Kevin DeYoung (MDiv, Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary) is the senior pastor at Christ Covenant Church in Matthews, North Carolina. He serves as board chairman of the Gospel Coalition and blogs at DeYoung, Restless, and Reformed. He is assistant professor of systematic theology at Reformed Theological Seminary (Charlotte) and a Ph.D. candidate at the University of Leicester. He is the author of several books, including Just Do Something; Crazy Busy; and The Biggest Story. Kevin and his wife, Trisha, have seven children.

Posted at: http://gcdiscipleship.com/2018/11/29/the-way-of-worship/